You know...it's not like I expect Hollywood actors to be role models for kids, for crying out loud. I sure don't look to them for any help
with anti-drug messages (well, that are convincing anyway). And I certainly don't look to them for advice about sexual relationships, that would
be laughable in a town where the most serious relationships last roughly the length of a hasty lunch, or maybe a wait in rush-hour traffic at best.
But nothing ever prepares me for the kind of news I heard over the last few days: Jeffrey Jones, the actor who played Ferris Beuhler's high school principal in Ferris Beuhler's
Day Off and the Amazing Criswell in Ed Wood has been arrested for trying to photograph sexual acts by a minor and also for possesion of child pornography.
At the same time (maybe even the same day), Paul Reubens, aka, Pee-Wee Herman was also arrested for possesing something like "artwork depicting sex by minors" or some such thing. His charge sounds
pretty flimsy, but this is the same man caught masturbating during a porno movie in Sarasota, FL many years ago, virtually shutting down his career. Both these arrests were from the same investigation
over the same reports over the last year and enacted their last legal day.
Last month and this it was Winona Ryder and her shoplifting charge for which she was convicted. Apparently she really has a problem with that.
Anyone remember when Margot Kidder was essentially a street person and found spinning on somebody's front lawn like Curly Howard in the middle of the night? Oh, that was a good one. [UPDATE-- Mike "Deadguy" has commented I'm being too insensitive about this case, but I never totally believed the "Alzheimer's" story. If I'm wrong, I apologize, but read his email to me in "Letters to the Editor", below.--N]
I'm not even touching the Robert Blake murder case. Except to say it was that issue of PCR where I trotted out my favorite cases of "Bizarre Hollywood"--the strangest people in the world commiting the strangest acts in the world---that the Jeffrey Jones case reminds me of.
I don't know any particulars of the Jones case, but know that, no matter how this goes for him, watching Ferris Beuhler, or Amadaus, or Beetlejuice, will likely never be the same. The Ed Wood movie will be OK, it's all about degenerate Hollywood anyway! What gets me--what always gets me--is that these are
celebrities for chrissake--don't they know the world watches their every move?? Why would big stars take insane chances like that? They have it made, don't they? Or is the "pressure" of being rich and famous so horrendous they seize every opportunity to take huge risks to their career?
As this issue was being "put to bed" for the week, the news came in about "Wacko Jacko", and did not make an earlier edition.
Michael Jackson displayed shocking carelessness recently when he dangled his baby over the railing of a hotel balconey in Italy where he'd been staying. He was trying to wave to the crowd with one hand and show off the child with the other, which momentarily endangered the child.
Jackson has since conveyed extreme regret for the incident, saying he "didn't know what he was thinking", but had apparently gotten "caught up in the excitement of the moment."
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Mike Smith's Movie Roundup
Ah, the signs that the holidays are almost upon us are everywhere. Holiday music fills the airwaves, the first lights and street decorations are starting to appear and every weekend from now until the new year will bring a shiny, wrapped present from Hollywood. The season began on November 1, when "Santa Clause 2" hit the big screen. The week after brought "8 Mile," which grossed more then $50 million dollars it's opening weekend. This past Friday, "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets" opened to much success. And it was only the beginning. In the next eight weeks, an assortment of films, from crowd pleasing blockbusters to Academy Award worthy fare, will be hitting the local multiplexes. The past two years have had seven films released in November/December gross over $100 million dollars. The three listed above seem likely to join that club and several films listed here have a chance to join them. Here is a listing of what to look for. Please note that release dates may change at the whim of the film companies. A review of "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets" will appear next week.
NOVEMBER 22
Die Another Day - It's been 40 years since James Bond first hit the screen in "Dr. No." This film, the 20th in the series, finds Bond in disfavor with British Intelligence. They have relieved him of his "license to kill" and he must now fight to earn it back. Pierce Brosnan is back for the fourth time as Bond, with Halle Berry, as Jinx, the very first Bond girl with an Oscar on her mantle. James Bond is the most successful franchise in movie history and Brosnan recently signed up to play Bond again. The last Bond film, "The World Is Not Enough," made $127 million in North America, so this one looks to easily join the $100 million club.
Friday After Next - Ice Cube and Mike Epps return in this comedy tale that takes place in the "hood" during Christmas. Both "Friday" and "Friday After Next" had great appeal to both black and non-black audiences, and the box office success of "Barbershop" proves that Ice Cube has major cross over appeal.
NOVEMBER 27
Treasure Planet - The seasons animated present from Walt Disney is an updated version of "Treasure Island" set in space.
Adam Sandler's 8 Crazy Nights - Animation for older kids. Sandler voices several of the characters found on his comedy albums, including Whitey the basketball ref, in this holiday comedy. Fans of Sandler's "Chanukah Song" will be happy to hear this film includes a new version.
Solaris - Oscar-winning filmmakers James Cameron and Steven Soderbergh team up to make this space epic about an astronaut who is haunted by visions of his dead wife. George Clooney and Natascha McElhone star.
DECEMBER 6
Adaptation - Writer Charlie Kaufman and director Spike Jonze, the Oscar nominated talent behind the quirky "Being John Malkovich" return to the screen in a tale about a screenwriter who ends up writing himself into the movie he's working on. Stars Nicolas Cage (as twins), Meryl Streep and Kansas City's own Chris Cooper.
Analyze That - This sequel to "Analyze This" finds mobster Paul Vitti let out of prison early and placed in the charge of his psychiatrist. Robert DeNiro, Billy Crystal and Lisa Kudrow return.
DECEMBER 13
Star Trek: NEMESIS - In what is being billed as the final big screen appearance of the "Next Generation" crew, Captain Picard and crew are called away from the impending marriage of Will Riker and Deanna Troi and sent on a diplomatic mission to deal with the Romulans. This is the 10th film in the "Trek" series and looks to be more emotionally intense then some of the other entries.
The Hot Chick - Popular, but snobby, cheerleader gets what's coming to her when she wakes up to find she has become Rob Schneider! Hilarious hijinx ensue!
Maid in Manhattan - When a hotel housekeeper is mistaken for someone else, her life is turned upside down when she tries to maintain the ruse. Looks like "Pretty Woman" without the prostitute. Stars Jennifer Lopez and Ralph Fiennes.
December 18
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers - The second film in the planned trilogy, this is easily the most anticipated film of the season. Considering that the first film earned more then $300 million at the North American box-office and garnered 13 Oscar nominations, the expectations of this film are enormous. A lengthy preview has been playing in theatres for several months and audience reaction has been quite positive.
DECEMBER 20
The Wild Thorneberrys - Another Nickleodeon cartoon hits the big screen as the group travels to Africa and does battle with a group of poachers.
Two Weeks Notice - When his top assistant gives her two week notice, a billionaire realizes he needs her in his life more then he thought. Finally, the inevitable pairing of Hollywood's two biggest goofy romantic stars, Hugh Grant and Sandra Bullock.
The 25th Hour - Director Spike Lee details the last day of freedom for major drug dealer who is about to go to prison. Stars Edward Norton and Philip Seymour Hoffman. This is the first film that Lee has directed a film that he hasn't written.
Antwone Fisher - First time director Denzel Washington tackles this inspirational story of Antwone Fisher, a bitter young man who turned his life around. Not only is it based on a true story, the script was written by Fisher himself. Washington and film newcomer Derek Luke star.
Gangs of New York - The second most-anticipated film of the season. Director Martin Scorcese has wanted to bring this epic to the screen for more then a decade. The story tells of the various gangs that ruled early America and the struggles faced by one young man who has come from Ireland to avenge his father's death. Stars Leonardo DiCaprio, Daniel Day-Lewis and Cameron Diaz.
DECEMBER 25
Catch Me If You Can - DiCaprio again, this time in a comic true story about one of the most successful con men in history. Steven Spielberg directs a cast that also includes Tom Hanks and Christopher Walken.
Pinocchio - Roberto Benigni, who won two Oscars for his film "Life Is Beautiful," follows up that story with his vision of the classic Carlo Collodi fable. Benigni not only portrays the title character, but also writes and directs this film, which co stars his wife, Nicoletta Braschi.
DECEMBER 27
Chicago - The popular Broadway musical finally hits the big screen after years of starts and stop and all that jazz! Renee Zellweger and Catherine Zeta-Jones star as Roxie and Velma, while Richard Gere (who played Danny Zuko during the original Broadway run of "Grease") plays Billy Flynn. John C. Reilly also stars.
Confessions of a Dangerous Mind - Everyone remembers Chuck Barris as the creator of such daytime game shows as "The Dating Game" and "The Newlywed Game." Even more remember him as the host of "The Gong Show." A few even may know that he wrote the hit song "Palisades Park" for Freddie "Boom Boom" Cannon. But did you know that he was also a hired assassin for the CIA? George Clooney makes his directing debut with this story based on Barris' "unauthorized" autobiography. Sam Rockwell and Drew Barrymore star, with Julia Roberts in a small role.
OK, there you have it. And these are just the major releases scheduled. Lots of films to see this season. My advice: lots of double features! See you at the movies!
Heard from good friend, make-up F/X maestro Corey Castellano a few days ago. HOPEFULLY he'll be able to take a few days off from his insane movie schedule to visit family and friends back here at home, looks promising actually. But he gave me a rundown on just some of the projects he's working
on over the next few months. Sea Biscuit, the remake of the classic race horse movie is what he's working on right at the moment. Coming up: The Last Samurai with Tom Cruise. The S.W.A.T. Movie, yes, based on the old TV series, is in progress, and stars Samuel L. Jackson and Colin Ferrel.
Then there's Firefly, merely described to me as a "sci-fi western" produced by Buffy the Vampire Slayer's Joss Whedon. No more details than that at the moment, the mercurial Mr. Castellano likes to grab his pesos and run!
CELEBRITY PASSING: As I was assembling this section and uploaded this week's PCR, I intended to note the recent passing of movie great James Coburn at the age of 74, but neglected to do so, an oversight for which I apologize. Mike Smith does the late Mr. Coburn great justice in this week's Mike's Rant.
The Arrival of Shonen Jump by Vinnie Blesi...
The most popular manga magazine in Japan is Shonen Jump, the birthplace of the greatest artists and stories. Shonen Jump sells over three million copies every week, to ages ranging from junior high students to adults--in a country with half the population of the U.S.
Now, Viz Comics is proud to announce the November 2002 American launch of Shonen Jump, featuring the most popular comics from the original Japanese edition. Each issue of Shonen Jump is 256 or more pages for just $4.95. Plus, the comics in Shonen Jump are printed in the right-to-left Japanese-reading format to preserve the original artwork--but with English sound effects to make them as easy to read in America as they were in Japan. Produced with the cooperation of the original artists and editors, Shonen Jump is the new language of comics.
Curtis Circulation, is the national distributor for this title in U.S. and we are launching it next week, 11-26-02.
Flordiana TV Update by William Moriaty...
Kim Delaney Quits CSI Miami
Actress Kim Delaney quit the new series premiere show "CSI Miami" last week after filming ten episodes. Delaney quit the series stating that her role was not challenging enough. I'd have to agree with her. Her only "stiff" competition in this drab new series are the cadavers laying around the Miami-Dade morgue. Unlike mimicking the moves of actor Gregory Sierra, who quit his role as Lt. Lou Rodriquez after the first four episodes of "Miami Vice", I believe that Delaney will be moving on to bigger and better things. I heard a radio ad just two days ago for "CSI Miami" where David Caruso was babbling in his usual monotone about some crazed sniper whacking people in downtown Miami. Again I found myself wondering why anyone would bother watching this dribble, and wondering even more why it has consistently been in the top 10 since its debut.
"Haunted" Becomes A Ghost
While we're on the subject of the dead, "Haunted" is itself now dead in the water. UPN wisely pulled this turkey from its Tuesday evening line up this past week. Good riddance!
Will's Top Five Shows of the Season
Drum roll please!
1. Birds of Prey
2. Smallville (vying quickly for Number 1!)
3. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
4. The Twilight Zone
5. Good Morning Miami
"The Roswell Crash-- Startling New Evidence"
Yeah-- I'll believe this when I see it! And yeah, it's not about Florida, but it is a subject of interest to many readers of the PCR. Ennywho, the Sci-Fi Channel has up and paid a bunch of college profs to go digging in the desert to find-- er-- well-- uh, startling evidence! I guess you'll just have to tune in this Friday night at 8 P.M. on the Sci-Fi Channel to see just what startling evidence is unearthed! Maybe they found the same craft that has the two aliens who tried to abduct Dagwood in his dream sequence featured in this week's edition of "La Floridiana"!
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This week's issue
La Floridiana by William Moriaty
It's here! THE DENIS LEBRUN INTERVEW! Part 1
On September 12, 2002, I was fortunate enough to conduct an interview with Florida Folk Hero and best friend Denis Lebrun, who is the primary artist for the world-famed King Features Syndicate comic strip "Blondie". Enjoy!...
....................................Click here for more.
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This Week's Movie Review:"Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets"
Review by Mike Smith. The holiday season is upon us and Hollywood has dropped its first big present down our chimney. And I'm happy to say that not only is it just what we wanted but it fits perfectly!....
..........................................Click here for more.
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This week's issue
Deadguy's Dementia by Michael Scott
THE CHAPEL OF BONES. First in a series.
So
what does a 19th-century interior-decorator do with a Christian chapel and a
large number of corpses? He does what anyone would do....he decorates....
..........................................Click here for more.
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This week's issue
Matt's Rail by Matt Drinnenberg
LET THE CELEBRATION BEGIN: FORRY WINS AGAIN!!!!!...The Forry vs Ferry battles wins an encouraging victory......
ON A MORE SOMBER NOTE......HOMELAND FRAUD...the dark business of US "security"....
..................................Click here for more.
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This week's issue
Mike's Rant by Michael A. Smith
BUEHLER? BUEHLER?. Wow! Jeffrey Jones and Pee Wee nabbed in the same investigation!
.......LOIS LANE REVEALED. This week, Deadguy takes issue with Nolan's remarks about Margot Kidder.
.......PASSING ON. Hollywood lost two more people this week.....
..................................Click here for more.
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 We welcome your feedback.
Nolan,
Something I found little "less" funny than you, was your comment about Margot Kidder. I
don't know if you were aware of this or not, but the reason she was found
running in circles in someone's yard (backyard, actually), with teeth
missing, and no recollection of how she got there, was due to the Alzheimer's
she suffered from. She's had it for awhile, but for some reason, it really
took ahold of her at that time, and really messed her up.
Basically, she was reported missing when she was dropped off at the airport
to visit someone in another state (or city, I forget), and never arrived at
her destination. After she'd been dropped off, she apparently wandered out
of the airport, and somehow ended-up in someone's yard 3 days later with a
couple of teeth broken-out, with no idea of who she was or how she got there
(and in a lot of pain from the broken teeth, too, I might add).
When she was found, it took a few more days for someone to make the
connection between the "unknown homeless person" and the Missing Person's
report.
To me, that's just about frickin' horrifying that a person could degenerate
to that state and get into that kind of trouble even their with "friends"
around. From experience with Alzheimer patients, I suspect she may have
fallen at the airport and broke out some teeth. The resulting pain would
have pushed her beyond her availible mental ability to cope, and she'd have
"gone off the deep end". It's interesting though that the airport had no
idea that anything had happened, suggesting she may have been mugged when
she lost her teeth, and possibly her sanity. It's likely that no one will
ever know what actually happened.
I'm thinking that you didn't realize all of this, because if you did, you
probably wouldn't have lumped it in with the whole "role model scandal"
thing, it simply wasn't her fault. Unless you intended to include
Christopher Reeves in there too, with his "silly horse tricks", and how he
went from being "Superman", to "sitting around all day".
"Don't they know the world is watching them?" Ironic choice of words,
indeed. If SOMEONE had been watching her like they should have been, this
wouldn't have happened.
Anyways, just felt your inclusion of her was a bit harsh, and felt compelled
to respond to it. Seriously, I hope I haven't offended you with all this
--Mike [Deadguy]
Only the crack about Christpher Reeve.
OK, well, maybe I'm too cynical in my view of weird Hollywood, but I never totally believed the "Alzheimer's" story. To me the whole deal sounded
indistinguishable from a severe case of drug overdose/withdrawal/dementia. I'm so used to celebs and their PR agents making up stories to excuse their
insane behavior, I just wrote her off as another Betty Ford clinic candidate. I could've SWORN on a stack of Superman capes, Margot Kidder returned back to work soon afterwards,
which would undermine the whole Alzheimer's deal. If she's truly unemployable due to her condition, I apologize if I seemed insensitive.
And SPEAKING of Superman, your comment about Christopher Reeve is uncalled for, his paralysis from the horseback-riding accident is well-documented, and he remains, to me,
among the GREATEST of all Supermen!!---Nolan
[UPDATE: 11-21-02. See this issue's Mike's Rant for a further clarification of this episode!]
To send an email to Letters to the Editor write to: Crazedfanboy1@aol.com. Any emails sent to this address will be assumed intended for publication unless you specifically instruct me not to. I can and do respond privately, if that is your preference. Frequently, it's both ways.---Nolan
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"Mike's Rant" is ©2002 by Michael A. Smith "Matt's Rail" is ©2002 by Matthew Drinnenberg "La Floridiana" is ©2002 by William Moriaty This week's movie review of "Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets" is ©2002 by Michael A. Smith "The Enlightenment" is ©2002 by Terence Nuzum "Deadguy's Dementia" is ©2002 by Mike "Deadguy" Scott Add'l thanks to Deadguy for his input in "Letters" All contents of Nolan's Pop Culture Review are ©2002 by Nolan B. Canova
Webpage design and all graphics herein are creations of Nolan B. Canova ©2002; all rights reserved.
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