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Now in our seventh calendar year
PCR #317  (Vol. 7, No. 16)  This edition is for the week of April 17--23, 2006.

"American Dreamz"  by Mike Smith
For Immediate Release....Citizen X Hero Of The Week....Quote of the Week....Civil War in Iraq. Move On, People, Nothing To See Here!  by Vinnie Blesi
The Guzzos in Hollywood....Duke University Men's Lacrosse Team....Hot Female Teachers Having Sex With Male Students...."Clash of the Titans" and Ray Harryhausen  by Mark Terry
Reunited....Stunned....TomKitten....My Favorite Films -- Part 16: "Field of Dreams"  by Mike Smith
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CITIZEN X by Vinnie B. For Immediate Release. April 17th, 2006. From Concerned Citizens for CITIZEN X (CCCX).

In the early morning hours of Easter while working on his column for this week's PCR, CITIZEN X, was abducted from his home by under paid workers wearing blue vests and whisked away in a black van with a large smiley face on the side.

Our intelligence reports have revealed that CITIZEN X, is currently being held in the stock room of a SuperCenter, where his civil and human rights are being violated, such as being forced to drink only Sam’s cola. It is every American’s right to have access to Coca-Cola.

The demands of the alleged terrorist kidnappers are that CITIZEN X denounces Tesco’s and publicly support the implantation of RFID chips into every citizen of America and China.

We will keep you posted on the latest updates as they are received. CITIZEN X’s parents have appealed to the Bush administration for help but have been referred to the Dept. of Homeland Pedophilia instead. CCCX is currently working with Amnesty International, the Red Cross, and Jimmy Carter to safely secure the release of CITIZEN X. The following is the column that he was working on at time of his abduction.

Citizen X Hero of the Week
Newly-elected council member of Tequesta Village (very Prisoner like), Basil Dalack refused to read the oath of office in protest to the alleged war in Iraq. Congratulations to Mr. Dalack for showing that we can be good Americans without blindly and stupidly following our government. All I can say is remember Hitler and fascism.

Quote of the Week
With our borders between Mexico and Canada pretty much unsecured it was with amazement that I read that a state of the art border inspection station has been opened between the state lines of Alabama and Florida. Agriculture Commissioner Charles Bronson said, “ There’s a lot of agriculture in Northwest Florida that needs to be protected”. The Bush administration. Keeping us safe from terrorist fruit.

Civil War in Iraq. Move On, People, Nothing to See Here!
“Civil war: a war between political fractions or regions within the same country.” Random House Dictionary ©1973

There it is in black and white. However Bush’s misspeak (his own version of doublespeak) denies there is a civil war going on in Iraq. All you have to do is read the headlines daily to see the ongoing war between “political and religious factions” in Iraq.

What is amazing is that due to his masterful misspeak, some Americans think that Saddam Hussein was behind the WTC bombings. Iran, Iraq, it is pretty much all the same. If people don’t even remember who bombed us on 9/11, then it won’t make much difference to them if it is Iraq or Iran. Who are we are war with? Eastasia or Eurasia?

What a second, there is pounding at the door. Oh My God, someone is knocking down my front door. Hey what the ……………………………………………………….

"Citizen X" is ©2006 by Vinnie Blesi.  Citizen X main graphic by Vin Blesi.  Webpage design and all graphics herein (except where otherwise noted) are creations of Nolan B. Canova.  All contents of Nolan's Pop Culture Review are ©2006 by Nolan B. Canova.