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   Now in our seventh calendar year!
    PCR #317  (Vol. 7, No. 16)  This edition is for the week of April 17--23, 2006.

"American Dreamz"  by Mike Smith
For Immediate Release....Citizen X Hero Of The Week....Quote of the Week....Civil War in Iraq. Move On, People, Nothing To See Here!  by Vinnie Blesi
The Guzzos in Hollywood....Duke University Men's Lacrosse Team....Hot Female Teachers Having Sex With Male Students...."Clash of the Titans" and Ray Harryhausen  by Mark Terry
Reunited .... Stunned .... TomKitten .... My Favorite Films -- Part 16: "Field of Dreams"  by Mike Smith
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My Second Toe Is Longer Than Yours  

The Guzzos in Hollywood
Last Thursday I met up with Pete and Paul Guzzo in Santa Monica at the LA screening of their film "99." First off, last Thursday's traffic was worse than expected out here in LA. I think everyone was taking Friday off and getting out of town early for Easter. It took me 2 and a half hours to go 25 miles on the 405. It was making me sick. You guys in Florida think I-4 is bad? I had a meeting with my manager first than ran late to the screening. By the time I got to Santa Monica the credits were already rolling on the movie. From the footage I saw during the credits the film seemed to be very funny. In addition, the screening room was very comfortable and in a great area. When you walk out of the screening room you are looking at the ocean and the Santa Monica Pier. Very cool stuff. Every time I see that pier I think of John Carpenter's "Escape from LA" and the huge tidal wave going over the Ferris wheel. Anyway, I got to get a screener of "99" from the Guzzos to watch it.

Duke University Men's Lacrosse Team
How about the Duke University Men's Lacrosse Team? What a bunch of jackasses. Two of the guys got busted for rape at some kind of stripper party. This does not surprise me. Things like this happen in college athletics all the time. I played Division II NCAA basketball at Saint Leo University. Usually the best athletes get all the breaks and never even graduate from college. The good kids (like me) who bust their ass in school and sports get over looked. I am glad these dumb asses got busted because most of the bad kids who do this kind of stuff usually get away with it. I didn't even know Lacrosse was a NCAA sport. Here is my message to the idiots on their team. "Have fun in jail assholes and when you come out stop being a sissy and play a real sport."

Hot Female Teachers Having Sex with Male Students
The title of this little rant sounds like those emails you get from porn sites but it's true. If I am not mistaken there are two cases of this going on. Of course, the most famous one in Florida. I also read about a teacher in Tennessee who got busted for the same deal. She went back to jail recently for contacting the 14-year-old boy via MySpace. How sad. First, I have to ask why it's so detrimental or embarrassing to be a 14-year-old guy that has had sex with a hot blonde teacher in her 20s? If you went to my high school and did that you would have been a God. Second, why can't these teachers find any guys their age? I would have been more than happy to date either one of them. Especially, the one from Tennessee who was a former Ms. WCW Monday Nitro. Here is a piece of advice for both of them. You two would fit in great here in Hollywood. Please get out here ASAP and contact me. I am not hard to find. I am sure Playboy would love to have you in their magazine. Call me, there is money to be made!

"Clash of the Titans" and Ray Harryhausen
On Wednesday, April, 19th I am going to the Mann's Chinese Theater with some friends to watch "Clash of the Titans." After the movie there will be a Q&A with special effects master Ray Harryhausen, actor Harry Hamlin, and author Ray Bradbury. Being able to go to events like this, is one of the very cool things about living out here in Hollywood. I have also said "Clash of the Titans" is prime for a updated/remake like "King Kong." Just let me play Calibus. We can have Tom Cruise play Zeus and really bastardize it then. I will have a full report next week on how this exciting event went down.

"My Middle Toe Is Longer Than Yours" is ©2006 by Mark Terry.  Webpage design and all graphics herein (except where otherwise noted) are creations of Nolan B. Canova.  All contents of Nolan's Pop Culture Review are ©2006 by Nolan B. Canova.