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Nolan's Pop Culture Review 2009!
   Assistant Editor / Co-Moderator:  Terence Nuzum.                 HOME           ARCHIVES
Established A.D. 2000, March 19. Now in our tenth calendar year!
Number 498  (Vol. 10, No. 41). This edition is for the week of October 5--11, 2009.

"Couples Retreat"
Retroween: A Collection of Characters
Memoirs of an Otaku Part 2: Life in Japan
Kill The Dollar .... Taxing The Benefits .... Running To Stand Still .... Harry Makes Me Uncomforable Too .... Ftc: Fine The Bloggers .... Internet Filtering? .... .... i
Braylon Edwards A Jet .... Rush Limbaugh Wants To Buy The Rams .... 0-4. Walk The Plank .... D-nabb Good To Go .... Kickoff! .... .... .... r
My Trip Up North .... Don't Say I Didn't Warn You .... Told You It Wasn't About Drugs .... Big Apple Bound .... Catching Up .... .... .... .... My Favorite Films, Part 2... y

'Tis the Season
'Tis The Season
Top 10 Worst Movies of the Decade/Century?
Mel Gibson's Drunk Driving Record Expunged
Readers' Comments


Ah, yes, even at this relatively early date in October, Halloween is already in the air. Costume party invitations are being sent out, conventions are springing up (like Orlando's Spooky Empire, formerly ScreamFest), Hollywood's product is taking a meatier turn (Zombieland), and the crisp weather of Fall is being felt.

Well, OK, not so much that last one in Central Florida. Afternoon temps are back in the 90s with the associated high humidity, but, hey, I was just waxing poetic there for a moment.

As I write this, ED Tucker's Retrorama is the only Halloween-themed column posted this issue, but I'm expecting plenty more in the coming weeks from my talented and warped staff. Even Ye Olde Editor is taking a little more time to get spooky this month.


As I was getting ready to put last week's PCR "to bed", I learned that the movie review website Rotten Tomatoes had posted their Top 100 worst movies of the decade (so far, haha). Since I didn't get to it, I fully expected Mike Smith (Mike's Rant) to cover this chestnut last week, but such was not the case.

Excerpted below for your amusement and feedback are Rotten Tomatoes Top 10 Worst Movies of the past 10 years (I guess you could say "of the century" as well!).

  • "Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever". The 2002 action film starred Antonio Banderas and Lucy Liu -- RottenTomatoes.com says it was the worst-reviewed film of the past decade.

  • "One Missed Call," Eric Valette's 2008 remake of Japanese horrormeister Takashi Miike's "Chakushin Ari".

  • Oscar-winning writer-director Roberto Benigni's "poorly made, creepy vanity project" "Pinocchio" (2002)

  • 2005 Anthony Anderson comedy "King's Ransom," directed by Jeff Byrd.

  • 2004 comedy "National Lampoon's Gold Diggers," from first-time director Gary Preisler ("tame, toothless and dull").

  • 2004 sequel "Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2," which employed the talents of Jon Voight and Scott Baio to put bad jokes in the mouths of babes.

  • 2008 comedy "Strange Wilderness," which saw stoner documentarians Steve Zahn and Jonah Hill stranded in the woods.

  • 2000 low-brow comedy "3 Strikes," from director DJ Pooh.

  • Andy Cheng's 2007 effort "Redline," described as having "plenty of bad acting, laughable dialogue and luxury cars".

  • and 2008's "Witless Protection," one of several films on the list starring Larry the Cable Guy.

    None of the 10 worst films had even one positive review; in RottenTomatoes' parlance, they were 100 percent rotten.

    Other familiar names from the Top 100: actors Steven Seagal (#19, "Half Past Dead"), Madonna ("Swept Away," #65), Paris Hilton (#67, "The Hottie & the Nottie") and Eddie Murphy (#79, "The Adventures of Pluto Nash"), as well as directors Renny Harlin (2006 fright-fest "The Covenant" at #31) and Uwe Boll (#48, 2006's "BloodRayne," and #42, 2003's "House of the Dead").

    Remakes are always dicey: 2002's "Rollerball" is #28, one slot below notorious failure "Battlefield Earth," while 2005's "Yours, Mine and Ours" is at #63.

    Ben Affleck is well represented, too, for an Oscar winner, with the expected "Gigli" at #73 and "Surviving Christmas" at #91.

    And who could forget "Epic Movie" or "Basic Instinct 2"?

    Thanks to Rotten Tomatoes for this intriguing(haha) retrospective.


    A judge has ruled that Mel Gibson's conviction stemming from his notorious 2006 drunken driving arrest is being expunged.

    The ruling Tuesday came after his lawyer had requested the dismissal. The actor-director successfully completed the terms of his three-year probation following the misdemeanor drunken driving arrest in which he made derogatory comments about Jews and women.

    OK, so, now we all pretend like this never happened. Purge it from your memory. Collect all magazine and newspaper accounts in your possesion and cut out all references to Mel's anti-Semitic roadside rant, mug-shot and arrest record.

    Since it's been expunged, I'm sure the original incident will never come up in conversation again. Like Pee-Wee Herman's expunged masturbation incident, right? Yep, never heard of it.

    Readers' Comments

    The Readers' Comments section for this issue of PCR is now closed. To continue to interact, please use the Message Board or write a Letter to the Editor! The comments below are listed starting withthe most recent. Thank you.

    Crazed FanComments -- We Welcome Reader Feedback on any article(s) on this page.
    skanky_adult_theatre_girl [11-10-2009 04:29] 
    Eeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeew!
    Lucky Charms Leprechaun [11-10-2009 01:23] 
    That's a good enough reason to watch pornography in the comfort of your house instead.

    They're magically delicious!
    Drew Carrey [10-10-2009 20:23] 
    I don't know. If I was in an adult theater, I'd kind of expect to see that.
    O.J. [10-10-2009 17:39] 
    I can understand how it can get you arrested, George Michael. Imagine how angry you would be if you were the one seated in the row directly in front of pee wee.
    Petrey [10-10-2009 16:15] 
    Chris, you nailed THE FOG. That's my favorite horror film ever made. As you said, the score, the atmosphere and the photography are great. I saw this in 1986 at 3AM with the wind blowing through the window and it gave me chills. I personally can't find a single flaw with the film but that's just an opinion. The remake will be long forgotten but this one is etched in stone!! I have an uncle named Tom A'd'kins so seeing his name always gives me a laugh.
    Michael [10-10-2009 09:26] 
    Steve, indeed we are. It's funny, sometimes someone will notice how he or I have a particular mannerism and then notice that someone else in the family also has it. It took forever to get everyone into that picture.....reminded me of "The Godfather," though as far as I know nobody asked my brother Jim for any favors "on the day of his daughter's wedding."
    Terence [10-10-2009 06:33] 
    Happy B-day Ed Wood!!! you wouldve been 85!
    George Michael [10-10-2009 05:36] 
    I still don't understand how the act of masturbation can get someone arrested! I mean, it's not like he was in a public square in front of everyone...Pee Wee was in an adult book/video store!
    shyguy [10-10-2009 05:08] 
    sppoooooookyyyyyyy.............. .............
    Steampunk Steve Beasley [10-10-2009 02:32] 
    Mike, I was gonna say how interesting it is that you and Phillip actually look amazingly like your newfound family, but then I realized, DUH...you ARE actually family!

    (Sometimes I can be a bit slow) ;-)
    lonelyboyz [09-10-2009 17:33] 
    anyone going to spooky empire? how about halloween horror picture show 09?
    Michael [09-10-2009 09:38] 
    Hello from NYC! Thanks for the kind words, Maypo. The photo I ran made me look like a Blues Brother but it was so large it took up the whole Rant. Oh well, now I can pose for a proper "hat" photo!

    Wow, President Obama wins the Nobel Peace Prize...kind of makes up for blowing the Olympics!
    The Maypo Cowboy [09-10-2009 04:10] 
    I just read Mike's column this week. It's amazing that Pete Best is up for a Grammy award this year! Crazy, Man! I've been aware of this guy since at least the late '60s and only know has it been for anything current. Kudos to Mr. Best for continuing to plug away for all these years and to Mr. Smith for including him on this week's, "Rant".

    I can't wait to see the FEDORA! I've always dug the old movies where the men wore homburgs, porkpies, trilbys, bowlers and other cool hat styles and if I were much slimmer, I'd wear'em...regardless of anyone's opinion. Those hats were much cooler than trucker/baseball style caps!
    Michael [08-10-2009 18:34] 
    Wow, sorry I missed the whole RottenTomatoes thing. Especially since they carry my reviews. However, I will post my summation of "Ecks vs Sever" as it first appeared in the PCR:

    "What could, and should, have been an acceptable action film turns out to be "sever" ly disappointing. "

    Get it? SEVERly disappointing! Jesus I'm one funny guy!
    Frankenberry [08-10-2009 18:21] 
    As much as I can appreciate Dwayne Johnson's thespian skills, my money is on Britton's moldy balcony.
    J. Alfred Prufrock [08-10-2009 18:17] 
    Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson may be the the next Phillip Seymour Hoffman. His performance in 2007's "The Game Plan" was absolutely amazing. I had tears streaming down my face the whole time, either from the performance or from whatever mold grows in the Britton's upstairs theaters.
    Barry Allen [08-10-2009 17:10] 
    It smells like Super Skunk 420?
    the_rock [08-10-2009 16:54] 
    can you smell what the rock is smokiiiiiiiiing?!
    Adam Ant - Mighty Mite [08-10-2009 15:55] 
    Hi Simon,

    I remember the wrestler Max Payne, he had a fairly short career in wrestling after an inauspicious beginning. I think he made a couple of B grade movies and then...he kinda evaporated.
    Simon Lynx [08-10-2009 14:13] 
    Never saw MP but I know they got sued for the name and the game too. Years ago there was a wrestler named Max Payne, He had a dark gimmick and was mysterious and etc.

    Bob Asshole Jones - Book Nook Manager [08-10-2009 00:00] 
    One of the worst movies in my mind was Max Payne. Perhaps I expected too much because the game was great!
    Nolan [07-10-2009 23:55] 
    I never saw Ecks vs Sever because the horrible reviews, but, ironically, I feel like I want to now to see the worst movie of the century.

    To Puff: Great idea! I like the day-by-day thing, and it enlightens with recommended reading. Nicely done. That said, please remember the self-promotion rule here, throw in some PCR commentary along with the link next time. Not trying to be difficult, we're struggling to keep link-hopping to a minimum.
    Yelsaeb [07-10-2009 23:55] 
    Hey! Dating older women can pay huge bonuses when your young! There was a time...ah, nevermind.
    pee wee [07-10-2009 16:56] 
    Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever truly did suck. Gold diggers turned my stomach, with young guys dating old ladies. Redline actually wasn't that bad.
    Chris Woods [07-10-2009 16:18] 
    For the worst movies of this decade I can think of tons because there was a lot of crap this past ten years. Especially horror films. I think I can count on one hand all the good horror films to come out in the 2000's.
    Chris Woods [07-10-2009 16:14] 
    ED - I enjoyed your article on Halloween costumes. That brings back memories for me. I use to have a bunch of Star Wars, super heroes and other cartoon character ones.
    Puff Chrissy [07-10-2009 14:01]  
    I've been doing Puff-Tober-Ween on my site, where I focus on something scary every day, whether it be a movie, TV show, comic book, short story or whatever. I'm having a lot of fun doing. Check it out if you want.
    J.MILLER [07-10-2009 13:47] 
    Nole -- You shouldnt have ever heard about PeeWee's masterbation incident because it was none of our business...I still say the man was a victim...Anybody that hangs around seedy porno theatres is ok in my book...
    Jerry Ulm [07-10-2009 12:22] 
    For reasons unknown to me, the Fletch soundtrack often goes for $30 minimum. Weird.......
    ED [07-10-2009 11:00] 
    Jason - Monster collectibles are great but it's hard to find vintage stuff cheap these days. I got a 1960's Creature bendy at a show years ago for about $5. The Remco figures, both the small and the large, from the 80's are pretty cool too.
    ED [07-10-2009 10:58] 
    Actually it was a jab at the people who used the controversy surrounding Michael Jackson and the mass hysteria his death caused to sell his memorabillia on eBay for huge sums of money.
    Jason Fetters [07-10-2009 10:57]  
    Ed- Interesting that you mention collecting for Halloween, I'm currently on a Frankenstein's monster buying binge. I bought a walking windup toy and I'm looking for a Universal Boris Karloff mask.
    I have been a fan of the creature since I was 3. I plan to spend the entire month looking for stuff.
    Nolan [07-10-2009 10:51] 
    Haha, WOW, that's a little dark, ED! I'm sure you meant something like, "when Mel Gibson finally croaks, I'll seize the opportunity to sell my Lethal Weapon 2 soundtrack." Hmmm....on second thought, that didn't sound a whole lot better than "I can't wait until Mel Gibson dies".
    ED [07-10-2009 10:37] 
    I can't wait until Mel Gibson dies so I can sell my soundtrack LP to Lethal Weapon 2 for $500.00 on eBay!
    Ernie Haire [07-10-2009 10:11] 
    I remember seeing King's Ransom. I didn't think it was THAT bad, but now I feel like I should give it another go.
    Terence [07-10-2009 08:51] 
    [31-12-1969 16:00] 
    End of Comments    

  • "Mike's Rant" is ©2009 by Michael A. Smith     "This Week's Movie Review" is ©2009 by Michael A. Smith     "La Floridiana" is ©2009 by William Moriaty    "FANGRRL" is ©2009 by Lisa Scherer Ciurro    "Retrorama" is ©2009 by ED Tucker     "Splash Page" is ©2009 by Brandon Jones     "State of the Nation" is ©2009 by Brandon Jones    "Growing Up Fanboy" is ©2009 by Chris Woods    "Sports Talk" is ©2009 by Chris Munger     "The Asian Aperture" is ©2009 by Jason Fetters     "Musical Musings" is ©2009 by Robert Tyler      All contents of Nolan's Pop Culture Review are ©2009 by Nolan B. Canova    
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